ALLIGATORS IN A HELICOPTER

a pro script reader ponders movies, reading, writing and the occasional personal flashback

Sunday, July 30, 2006

When Bad DVDs Happen To Good People

So I was pondering the state of my DVD collection tonight, and wondering what the worst DVDs were that had somehow made it onto my shelf.

(Never mind how they got there. It's a DVD shelf. Sometimes things just wash up).

I finally decided that it was a tie. "Legally Blonde 2", and "American Wedding". I'm already apologizing.

What's the worst DVD on your shelf?

37 Comments:

At 9:35 PM, Blogger Bill Cunningham said...

Oh, I so have you beat there...and they're my movies!

 
At 11:14 PM, Blogger Webs said...

Do my kids' count?

We've managed to buy them some excellent kid films ("Duma", e.g.), but my parents will get any old drivel ("Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead").

 
At 11:51 PM, Blogger m said...

Soul Survivors

Why?

The Dushku.

 
At 12:25 AM, Blogger wcdixon said...

'Resident Evil' and 'The Sweetest Thing'..."cringe"

 
At 1:27 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The two Shockers in my dvd collection;

Godzilla (Emmerich's awful remake) and Double Team (the one with "actor" Dennis Rodman and Van Damme)

Cheers
Juan

 
At 4:26 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, there's the "so bad, it's good" camp that is being ruled by either or , take your pick. Not counting those... I guess ... (don't ask)

 
At 6:05 AM, Blogger Tom said...

My sister-in-law gave me the movie version of Godspell on DVD. It's still sealed up.

I just ran through the rest of my DVDs, I think I'm pretty golden on the "no-shame" titles.

Okay, Mallrats is in there, but for purely educational purposes.

 
At 6:24 AM, Blogger Thomas Crymes said...

Without a doubt, the worst movie in my Collection is Lost in Space. I don't know whether I bought it drunk or a band of roving theives planted it there.

 
At 6:58 AM, Blogger marc bernardin said...

Dr. Doolittle...2.

There is no why.

 
At 7:36 AM, Blogger Spanish Prisoner said...

Cruel Intentions (mine) and Dragonball Z: Bardock - The Father of Goku (my brother's dvd)

 
At 7:39 AM, Blogger The Gambino Crime Family said...

xXx... It was late, it was on special and I had a spare £5 in my wallet. No excuse, but there it is...

 
At 7:39 AM, Blogger Chris Hansen said...

Gotta be Six Days, Seven Nights, that awful Harrison Ford/Anne Heche film. My only excuse (and I feel the need to give one) is that it was one of those "get these 4 DVDs free with the purchase of this DVD player" deals. That deal also gave me my runner up, Lost in Space.

 
At 8:11 AM, Blogger Cathy Krasnianski said...

Yu Gi Oh, the movie. Gag!

My excuse - my 7 year-old!

 
At 8:31 AM, Blogger Not A Winner said...

From Justin to Kelly.

Oh, SNAP! I doubt anyone can top that.

 
At 11:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Canadian Bacon" (bought it because the late-great John Candy always made me laugh). Michael Moore's first (and last?) attempt at doing a non-documentary feature film.

 
At 11:53 AM, Blogger Scribe LA said...

"Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.' It was buy 2 get a third free and there was literally nothing else available and... and... there really is no good excuse, except for a couple of scenes, like the one where Matt and Ben do a scene from "Good Will Hunting 2: Hunting Season."

 
At 12:57 PM, Blogger Dave said...

My best friend has instilled in me the "forgiveness" gene. I don't consider Legally Blonde 2 or American Wedding bad. I'm afraid that Jonathan might have it with Justin to Kelly. Of course, The Sweetest Thing was pretty horrible. I was embarassed to watch it by myself on cable (for free - minus the "life time" I lost watching it).

 
At 1:03 PM, Blogger Formerly, The Dude Spoke said...

I keep my copy of "Chill Factor" with Academy award winner Cuba Gooding Jr, and Academy Award watcher Skeet Ulrich. I keep it to remind me of impulse buying, and doing things just to make my roommates laugh.

the worst movie in my collection is Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me. and House Of The Dead.

 
At 1:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just bought my kid "High school Musical" and she watches it about every 3 HOURS! Time for the DVD player to have an accident -- "Huh...? I don't know why the DVD isn't playing, honey. Do you have it plugged in?" (I'm so going to hell)

 
At 1:24 PM, Anonymous phillip said...

I'm a 70's exploitation fan and as good as Netflix is there are tons of flicks they don't carry so I end up buying them on Ebay or Amazon. Here's a list of a few I know I will never watch again:

Black Gestapo (VHS)
Rituals (VHS)
Combat Shock
The Demoniacs
Point of Terror (VHS)
Docteur Jekyll et les femmes (actually not a bad flick but the DVD is just a homemade rip of an old VHS so it's like watching a movie with a jar of vaseline smeared all over the screen)

Suppose I should just put them all back up on Ebay but I'm too lazy.

 
At 1:51 PM, Blogger Tim Clague said...

Starsky and Hutch! At least with VHS you could tape over it!

 
At 2:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

El Chupacabra!

 
At 8:19 PM, Anonymous annabel said...

Willow!

 
At 2:48 AM, Blogger Rick said...

The Guy Ritchie remake of Swept Away with "lead actress" Madonna.

I swear I have no recollection of how it got onto the shelf.

 
At 4:38 AM, Blogger Random Brandon said...

The Next Karate Kid! with Academy Award winning actress Hilary Swank learning wax on wax off from Mr. Miyagi to fight street bullies!
Why? It came in the Karate Kid Quadrilogy pack. Love the first, guilty pleasure with 2 and 3, but 4...ugh!
Close second...GOTCHA! with Anthony Edwards.

 
At 5:35 AM, Blogger Averyslave said...

The Hunchback of Notre Dame II.

I'd blame my kids, but instead I blame a friend of mine who thinks she's funny.

 
At 5:58 AM, Blogger Not A Winner said...

I just want to add that I'll totally vouch for Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead, Mallrats, and especially Willow. All quality entertainment.

Madmartigan kicks ass, man. Best. Val Kilmer. Role. Ever.

 
At 6:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nashville.

I don't get it, I've never gotten it, I never will get it and I'm not even sure other people get it. I think its just one of those films that everyone has to say they like.

 
At 6:32 AM, Blogger victoriaellis0380@yahoo.com said...

I'm gonna brag a bit and say with just over about 480 DVD's in my library, I'd say the worst is the one my brother added... Freddy Got Fingered.

 
At 7:37 AM, Anonymous Vlad Tepes said...

Oooh. Freddy Got Fingered. Yeah. Tough call between that and From Justin To Kelly.
The problem with these sorts of lists, of course, is that "bad" is so subjective. I actually really like a lot of the movies people have listed.

 
At 1:40 PM, Anonymous Laura Reyna said...

Born in East L. A. -- A Cheech Marin 'social comedy'.

In Dreams -- dir by Neil Jordan , starring Annette Bening. Example of "when bad movies happen to talented people..."

 
At 6:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, that's easy. The Longest Yard. The Sandler remake, not the original. The only movie I've ever seen that has an entire character dedicated to product placement.

 
At 8:03 AM, Blogger Not A Winner said...

Yeah, I give props to Freddy Got Fingered as well. Nicely played. I'm happy to share the trophy.

 
At 4:36 PM, Blogger wcmartell said...

Well, I have all of my DVDs on my shelf...

- Bill

 
At 9:22 PM, Blogger Naila J. said...

Dukes of Hazzards. It was a present from my bf because I like Jessica's legs. :|

 
At 1:02 AM, Blogger Peter C. Hayward said...

"Are We There Yet?"

Can this one be beaten?

 
At 9:01 AM, Blogger Scott the Reader said...

I think it's pretty funny that no one has said "Gigli".

I still remember the time I went to a Blockbuster, and there were so many copies of "Gigli" on the previously-viewed sales rack (which was probably a lie in and of itself - hard to believe anyone even rented it) that I roamed around the store counting them all. As I remember, there were between 150 and 200. In one store.

You'd think they'd have started just giving them away after a while. Though they're probably being used as drink coasters.

 

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